I'm a Creep....--Radiohead

Alright, so I read over my past few blog entries. Wow, I'm an obsessed little creeper.
So I've decided to:
A-stop being such a creeper
B-write about something else for a change
C-write more often so I have something else to write about
D-work harder at being a good student; that's not to say that I'm not a good student now, but I procrastinate a lot. Probably because of stupid things like this blog, facebook, and the IC website
E-give myself an example, following.

Example
Wow, it's already been a long week and it's only Thursday. My last upload was only on Monday. I suppose that's just how it goes the first week of classes, the professors simply don't assign us much more than they have. I find that rather unfortunate. I'm so used to the workload I enjoyed in high school--coming home after play rehearsal and working (literally) from 10pm until anywhere from 2-4 in the morning. For a normal person, that's a decent amount of work. But if you need to be up at 6:30am at the latest to get ready for school again (though I usually woke up at 5:45am to finish last night's homework), over to Tess' house at 7am so you're not late for carpool, on the highway by 7:12am so you don't hit all the morning traffic, which tends to come around 7:15am, at school by 7:30am so you won't be late for homeroom (which I never went to anyway, being fully involved in the Morning Show for which I needed to be there at 7:45am at the latest), and ready to function like a normal human being...that's just a ridiculous workload for anyone.

Of course there were other factors; there always are. For instance, AIM was usually open. While I'm modestly good at multitasking, I usually reserved entire blocks of time for Ben and Margaret. Functioning like a normal person is next to impossible when one is literally running on 2-4 hours of sleep at night. On the bright side, school became my relaxing place, oddly enough. I did all my homework at night and ignored it all at school, devoting myself instead to things I enjoyed--talking with my friends, working on things for clubs, organizing the play I happened to be working on, meeting with teachers simply because I wanted to, etc. I loved high school. It was the hardest thing for me to get over once I came to college.

Funny how that worked. Most people get homesick--I never have in my life. Most people miss their friends and familiar hangouts--not so much for me. That makes me sound rude. I've never been homesick before because I've never honestly spent that much time at my home to make it feel like home. It truly stopped feeling like a home to me in sophomore year of high school. My friends, while I love them all to death, were not going anywhere. 95% of them were starting a new life like I was and we'd all be back in a few weeks anyway, the internet makes it multiple times easier to stay in contact, I was going to school with at least 6 of them, and I live by my phone--easy contact access for anyone trying to reach me. A warning, though, everyone likes to try and reach me at the same time. I promise I'm not ignoring you.

Nerinx Hall had become my home. I literally spent most of my time there; when I wasn't there, I was doing homework for my Nerinx classes, planning things for Nerinx's morning show, working out the kinks in Nerinx's play schedule, etc. My high school had become my home. I wanted to go back. Perhaps I should have written this entry a lot sooner.

Thanksgiving break (3 full months into my college career) I finally got my wish. I returned to Nerinx, got to say an official hello-goodbye to all my favorite teachers, did what I love--presented Invisible Children to 14 classes, and formed some kind of closure.

The broadcast professors told me never to become too involved in my first job out of college because I would surely leave it soon. They don't know me. I don't know if that'll happen. I had trouble leaving Nerinx (but I had to), I will surely have trouble now leaving Mizzou (but I'll have to), what else am I going to have to leave? So long as I have proper closure on things, I can move on. Without it, ... needless to say I was unhappy last semester, or at least uncomfortable. Truth be told I was the happiest I'd been in four years. This semester is looking much brighter now that the Nerinx weight has been lifted.

I have no good way of ending this, since my thought abruptly ended right there.

I have to give this out?

Invisible Children asked me to include any and all social networking sites on their Roadie application, which for me includes, obviously, this blog. Unfortunately, this blog was never meant to be shared with the public. That's not to say that it can't be; I certainly understand that the internet is no place to keep things private. Yet at the same time, I haven't told anyone about this blog because it's my "online journal" so to speak. And, after reading it over, it has become almost entirely devoted to Invisible Children...awkward.

Ah well. Life's funny that way, isn't it?

On another note, this semester is going to be hella busy--and I don't say "hella." That's how busy.
I'm taking 18 hours of classes, working weekends including travel, serving as president of the Mizzou Invisible Children club, organizing everything I can with our San Diego parent organization, keeping up with extra credit and work opportunities, as well as filling out a shitload of paperwork to study abroad, be a Roadie, sign up for classes over the summer and in the fall (and then cancel the ones in the fall, should I be accepted for the Roadie internship), and to get scholarships from my university and the honors college. On top of all that, I've got the usual social life to worry about, the troubles of being a daughter and keeping in contact with the family, which isn't as difficult as I made it out to be in high school, and old friends, and getting enough sleep at night and food during the day.

I'm so excited. I love to be busy!